born out of wedlock,
a bastard for a child,
though given the name of joy
she played the opposite part
angry, unhappy, uninspired,
blaming.
Not free.
great actress though,
led everyone else to believe
led everyone else to their free
relatively.
fore they could only truely be free if she
was free.
But blinded by delusion
she took responsibilty for everyone's life but her own
and she ALWAYS,
felt alone.
born in a time of little forgiveness
she made books her only order of business
intelligent,
naturally
manipulative,
heredity
creative,
instinctly
bright,
religiously
truth-full
when necessary
good-hearted,
purely
honest?
hardly
grate-full
theoretically
appreciative?
of what?
she'd say: I see nothing but a lack of self-worth, self-love, self-esteem and self-respect
her environment was a relfection of her IN-vironment
she lacked self
so she lacked.
born an arrogant bastard
now transformed
into a heavenly beast,
a leader of peace
at the age of 23
she's ready
to take herself back
to have her self's back
to walk ever forward without looking back
her best friend is
forgiveness
her truth is strength
she is in this to win this
no longer the shit
she is it.
as she has always been
didn't need be born again
that is only a metaphor of her journey
Arrogant?
at her best she was always humble
but til this point she had yet to be her best
Bastard?
this is still a fact
but not a definition.
her parents weren't married when they had her
because they were determined to be married to her
til death do us part
with them in her corner
she could never be lonely
or alone.
she has found home
where it always was
in her heart
grieving the death of her lesser self
good morning
every morning
i look in the mirror and see art.
gazing into eyes of a future leader
her leading role as her true-self is a very important part.
by: bajá marie
