Eternity: The Union of Mind, Body and Energy

There are many words to this piece that I don't wish to type or speak. AND unfortunately I can't display it the way it was created. So please make use of your neck muscles; tilt and turn to angle your antennaes to recieve the information and energy intended and blended to be absorbed.

Thank you,
Bajá Marie

See Inside Me, That Pussy Lining:

I have the key
See
I can see inside of me
beyond that pussy lining
where life is born in linings
and forms are born while laying (pronounced lying)
upon the thrown
the skin within
is liquid
and lucid
and soo unbelievable to the mediocre
they call it stupid
I call it
cupid.
Cuz once you see what I see
you too will love me...
But only when you see beyond
flesh and physicality
step and originality
text and tangebility
sex and sexuality
breath and living, breathing entities

Let go the cash flow
let the cash flow and go
or simply let go
and then we can go
go to the highest heavens
move mountains
breed unity, sisterhood and brethren
bear children
rare children
A new breed
if you believe what I believe
cuz you see what see
when you see me with your eyes and not with your head
when you touch me with nerve endings instead of your hand
when you feast on my mind instead of butter and bread with bedspread
when you collaborate by feeding your bass with my treble
it takes a ear that don't fear or embezzle
when you taste test the wisdom professed wide open
as I open the portal to the future worlds to you
the looking glass to my inside she
see inside me
beyond the lining of my pussy
take a peak
don't tell me what you see
Cuz me I already see
Speak
Not with the lips in your head
or your pocket's new born bread
Instead,
show me what you see
by loving me.

By: Bajá Marie

(Same picture in color. Drawn & Colored by; Bajá Marie)

I am the gift:

Whether it be sickness
or I be
sick with this
your interest
is worth more than my school loans interest
cuz it breed mentions
attention
as I entertain you with my talents
otherwise known as secret agents
to achieve missions.
Missions that will evolve the people
to need not the red, white or blue pill
for they are far past the hour of ill
nowadays
the people are insane
And I remain to stay sane
in this
my land of the people
home of the brave
I behave
I remain
I stay tame
I don't shame
but on the inside
I am in constant pain
because insanity is not instinct
therefore,
I am not the words I print in ink
I am not poetry
No, I lay still resting on the brink
til I break and then allow they
to say
I'm insane
But I'm not insane
You are
Though I am to blame
and so are you
are you following me with your eyes or your heart
fears or farce
impressions or remarks
Cuz I live far
too far to waste time
yet too close to be too far
I can still feel your energy
and the uneven beats of your heart
they were my drum for soo long
I forgot how to dance to the rhythm
But this sickness
I treat with
the illness
within me
 on the inside the beauty is the beast
and in the sheets....
(Pause: I smile here...)
But I live way over there
I rest my head
I say a prayer

There once was a fever here
A shiver there
lurking
within me
waiting
to be
Come
breath
taking
Debating
Mistaking
confused, abused, used
 no more
the key to war
a fever there was
a shiver
that trembled only on the marley floor
quivered from the soul of vocal chords
nibbled on left over ink stains of words the paper wore
the mic swore

I exchange no more for more
No more fever
no more flu
or flu-like symptoms
or eyes of red or green
no fades to black
no feelings of blue
Only of you
Now.
you and this
This right here
this
What do you call it?
This present day existence
this supercalafragulistic
this talent
this gift
it is my life now
I choose not to be plagued with sickness
and vow I do to the lifeless life of being
Sick with this....
This life
I am
the gift.

By: Bajá Marie
Til I get my money right
I am the gift,
I'll give you my magenta light.
I wish you infinite living days and Life-Full nights.

Alignment = Enlightenment

If enlightenment is your goal. You must understand that as long as you stand hunched over, knees buckled, numb and ALONE, you will never fly high, you will only die and live in limbo hoping your soul gets another try. Don't wait til limbo, change today!

Stand up straight
Look straight ahead
Imagine your limbs as roots
and your mind as the fruit
Move your roots
and feed your fruit
read books
ask questions
be curious
feel everything
numb nothing
pain is living
healing is flying
loving is living
hating is dying
because love is eternally multiplying
BE-CAUSE love is uniting

If you were meant to do it alone, you would be like the guy from one of the episodes off "The Twilight Zone" (I'm talking the black and white ones; yea I spent alot of time with my Moppie). You'd be living on this earth all alone. If you fear feeling pain and hurt you are biased in your eye-sight and not fully living your life. To ignite your light you must let go of your internal fight and unite with like-minded bodies and in-sight-Full (insightful in this case meaning - full of self-knowledge) spirits. Let your inner demons melt when you sweat and let the God-like light in as you consciously, unconsciously or even gasping for the daily breath you breathe (this is what I think to myself when I run on the track). I'ma leave it at that for now. There's more to this topic but all the insight can't come from me cuz I'm not the only one who can see...There are more of me and my mission is to attract them and align myself with them. This includes aligning myself with myself, that's the base and core piece of the structure. I do so through chanting, meditation, exercise, yoga and education. All of which are manifestations of stimulation which is the fertilizer to my seed. The seed of destiny. I'm am my own harvester by I always give appreciation to my mother and father for planting my seed, and caring for me.

As I bloom June so will you cuz we are interconnected 
And...
I love you,
Bajá Marie

Truth In Advertisements:

Found this billboard on Vermont and.... sorry I still new here I'm not good on streets. But I was in LA and I saw this...an advertisement for a radio station but I just felt it was oh so relevant to my life and pursuit so I took a picture and decided to share. Hope you feel it as much as I do, if not get aware.

B. Marie

Thickness: Take One!

I talked to my grandmother (Moppie) on the phone today and she said the first time I did raw (raw-food veganism that is) I was almost anorexic because no matter the weight I lost in my eyes I only saw thick.

While studying for the GRE Taryn & Thabisile brought to my attention that obesity could be a European ideology. I mean, health is important don't get me wrong. I put health before thickness but in the pursuit of health you get it confused with thinness. See...

I've be meatless for 3 years - meaning I'm a vegetarian/vegan. I am the embodiment of movement - meaning I've been dancing & entertaining since my mother's womb set me free. So exercise and diet have always been apart of me yet, I'm still thick. Damn near solid. My shit don't jiggle but it still taunts me. And when Thabisile said i had adopted European ideology and my Moppie said I had cropped the sight of myself with anorexic photography. I couldn't help but think that thickness is not my enemy. It's apart of me. And instead of battling against it I should walk with it. Shit I should strut it. With my head high. Should it stay with me for life or melt away with every healing day. I will honor its' attachment to me. Acknowledge its' bounce & sway. As my way. See...

This thickness, on me, is more than ass, hips, flabby arms & havin a stomach versus a flat rack or a six-pack. See, what the European ideology named as obesity is really about bein real with yourself & taking responsibility for your life & how you want to live it.

My thickness provides me with a lack of self-confidence, self-esteem & even self-worth. But on the other hand it gets me alot of attention, distinguishes me from the skinny jean majority & comforts/cushions me from the pain. Either way good and bad, in the middle it's who I am right now!!!

And as I make my descent into the sky, I know will shed it on the outside, and absorb it within to comfort my organs & transform from lack of self to more!

Thickness can be a miserable death sentence or a blessing in disguise. I've evolved to the point in my life where I see through the disguise; I just see the me I want to be within the thickness that I is.
I hope I am explaining this in a way we understand. If not I demand you to demand more explanation not from me but from within yourself. Cuz this thickness is more than a fatty melt diet disease. Smalls and mediums can contract the disease. Whether it's a blessing or a curse is up to me, we but mostly you. See...

I've done my part, but where are you.

Wherever you are, remember I love you.
And I'll explore this a little more in depth on Take Two!
Bajá Marie <3

In Living Color: This is my story

You've recieved one installment of my life story there is more to come. Last night I drew this picture with the thought of me. Nobody but me.

This picture is alot of things because this picture depicts the energy within me that cameras don't see. This morning my ex-boyfriend and close friend told me Thank you for shining your light...I said Your welcome? Didn't know I was shining anything, because everyday I'm struggling to be a human being because being a human noid is soo easy, but it doesn't make me happy. As this friend told me "We are not worker bees". I'm a truth bee. And truth comes in all colors and so does me. As you can now see in this my photography of me...Interpret it however you see...

Love is what I am, truth is what I do and kisses from me to you.

I love you, I'm not afraid, I love you, I do.

Because I truly love me,

Bajá Marie

The Difference Between Peace and Violence:

The difference

B. tween peace and violence

exists

in the prints

the blue prints

of our DNA

anatomical molecules

fossil fuels

and around the way.

The difference

be-tween peace and violence

exists in the prints

if you can't catch my drift

then please see what I say...

 

To the average eye the picture to the left looks like a fist with a fro and yes that is the surface purpose of this image but trust me the shapes and colors are meant to express mo. I mean damn near mo then I even know but I'll try to explain it. The rest is left to your own interpretation.

 But before I give a full explanation I must apologize for my poverty see, the only colorful materials I can afford are Crayola crayons (I made it a point to get name brand Crayons! Shit I gotta have name brand something!! I do live in the 21st century!! See I fit in a bit. Don't you think?!?!) so should something be unclear; blame the materials NOT the individual here.

Ok so on the next level of interpretation for the picture on the left, I say that a closed fist is meant to be a tool. A tool for survival = to work, to eat, to fight, to hold on to and hold tight to one's beliefs. Yet in the 21st century a fist has evolved to not a tool for survival but a nuclear bomb that leads to no survival. Our leading businesses that support our economies are those that arm war and house leading scientists experimenting on bombing = basically how to kill each other better. Back in the day a fist fight was the way but in this day a gun fight is the way and the result is an explosion. The explosion of a gun leads to bullets flung and the life those bullets take leads to many lives taken away til no life can relay and humanity (human beings) either don't finish the race or we finish in last place. In this picture the fro is an explosion and the red, orange and darker hues surrounding are to exemplify that. At the top there is yellow with the indentation of birds flying in purple. The ones that fly the highest are the only ones that will survive this. The explosion in the picture I mean though for you deep souls please relate this to reality. What I mean...is...there is soon to be an explosion of realness and only the fittest will survive this.. but that explanation is another level of this picture. A higher one...

I would like to move on to the picture on the right that shows an open hand filled with yellow light, green hieroglyphics and oranges lines in the midst. Surrounded by brown, black and then the colors of red, pink purple and green on the outer tips of the page. On the first level this picture states that an open hand causes no violence because an open hand can hold nothing and the only way it can make contact of any kind is by laying itself on open objects such as another open hand, an arm, a leg, the sore parts of your back, the land...

The inside of the hand is to symbolize human energy, we make moves and fuse energy through power lines to move our minds. The moves are characterized in green because the best living things are green and the lines are orange because orange is the sun (to me at least). This energy is outlined in brown because, in the time before reasoning all human beings came from the same place, if you are free to believe creation beyond the Bible then you will understand what I mean. But basically in this time all current continents were one and all human beings were one. As the land seperated over time so did we and that is when reason, logic and race came to be to replace unity, spirituality and being. Please excuse me if I've gone too deep. I hope that you are still following me...So the brown symbolizes when we were one and the black symbolizes the lines we've drawn now or the other way around, it's convertible really so it's whichever you prefer.

Oh and make a note that in each picture I traced a different hand the left picture is my right hand and the right picture is my left hand. My apologies for the confusion. There's an illusion here that I hope you can see, See... most people are right-handed meaning their left hand is weak and weakness has become the sibling of peace. So I reversed the facing of these hands above in hopes to plant the seed to reverse the relationship between peace and weak.

And I guess the rest I'll leave open for your own interpretation. I suggest researching the meanings of colors. It's a reason I spelled them out when you could just see them for yourself and I suggest asking questions if you feel totally lost in this. I'm just sharing what came from me and neither of these pictures are babies of weed, just pure creativity with the potent purpose of planting positivity. For you from me.

Because I love you

and I'm Bajá Marie

Passion Which Speaks Beyond Poetry:

I would like to take a minute to explain this week's blog entries...See...
  
My passion for expressing truth has evolved beyond poetry. Most call it the Holy Spirit, I call it simply remembering. Whatever we decide it takes a hold of me to the point where the pen can not depict it's meaning. And since I have no access to 24/7 surveillance I can't dance it because no one else would see it....See...

I'm an antennae for pure energy and energy is expressed best in color. My passion for expressing truth has evolved beyond lined pages and blue and black ink to a blind sight of colorful symphony - meaning simply I only see colors and I have to express it...See...

I don't know if you've figured this out by now. I'm a story teller. That's why I'm an artist. Everything I be, do and have comes with a story. And since my words are my wealth, sharing stories are good for my health, your wealth and the future. I value truth over all other things, because truth is the seed that blooms all positivity: love, healing, unity, community, purity, happiness, true-self, eternity, strength, flexibility, femininity, the list goes. It is my duty to express it so that human beings will receive it and human noids will download it...See...

I'm a weirdo, I'm Bajá Marie
And if you open your heart to me you'll see that these pictures are an extension of my poetry.
B. Cause my passion for truth speaks beyond symmetry to plant the seed (truth) in your reality.

I love you.

Honor Thy Father:

To all my women in attendance I must admit that this incessant ideal of being "INDEPENDENT" is real-diculous. Women need men just as men need women. And I just want to clarify I few things for the few categories of women I can identify with.

If you grew up your whole life with your daddy at home, honor thy father, accept him and his flaws because he stood the test of time and stayed there for you through it all.

If you grew up with your mother your whole life and your father was not around at all or had little to do with your life, honor thy father, accept him and his flaws, because he KNEW he wasn't shit and you deserved better so instead of giving you shit he decided the best thing to do was move and let you do you. And because he made that move you are stronger than you could've been with him around. I mean we all know from experience when a woman is around an ain't shit man long enough she becomes wounded and those wounds hurt worse when they come from your fertilizer (I mean father) so he saved himself from wounding you and saved you from deeper wounds - the extremely hard to heal ones. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and the absence of the father makes a women's will and determination stronger so you women are like XENA Warrior princesses and shit. Be appreciative cause it's alot of weak minded women out here. You are a gift to them and the rest of the world. Know that.

And if your father was around yet he wasn't completely present in cents and sense then you too are strong because you fought!!! I won't interpret that in any other way than YOU fucking fought my lady and no matter what the result was from that fight I already know you won because you fought. Even if your fight was a run. Shit I just started running on the track since I been in LA and I gotta say running is just as much a fight as any other. And there's also having the wisdom to know which action is right (by action I mean fighting or running, waiting or pacing, walking or laying).

My point in even exploiting these views is to say that happiness is YOUR choice and it has nothing to do with your daddy. Everything in your life: past, present and future is a manifestation of your karma and causes from your past, present and future lifetimes. (Buddhist believe in reincarnation so in the previous sentence my intent to express that you've been here before) You have to take responsibility for what your life has been, is and will be.

And get over this whole independent thing!! I'm speaking even to lesbian women as I am FULL of homosexual energy (I will drop the bomb to your question of what the fuck that means tomorrow lol). You too, as all we women need HE, but he doesn't have to be your daddy, your husband, HE could just be a friend. Accept the fact that you need HIM.

And for my heterosexual feminism women that point the finger always, cry blame, fake orgasms and play the "I've been hurt before" BULLSHIT(FULL of shit) game. I say give it up. Take out the bitter of your bittersweet cup. Just be sweet! Choice to be happy and you'll see.

But for all us women to choose happiness in the end. We have to honor where our stories begin. The seed doesn't grow without fertilizer. You wouldn't be here without HIM so stop convincing yourself you don't need him. Just accept him and free yourself of this bitterness and exchange it for your true bliss. Now I can't tell you how to do this, remember I'm just Johnny Appleseed. Planting seeds in your mind, but only your thoughts and vibrations will make them grow. I just want you to know.

So why the fuck did I bring this up do you ask?! Well if you look up above there is a picture of me and my father taken on my College graduation day (May 15, 2011). And when we both saw this picture we agreed unanimously that our energy united would make history. See my daddy's birthday is July 20th so he calls me 9 months and a day because if you count 9 months and a day from his birthday in 1988 you get my birthday on April 21, 1989. Right?! Right. SOooo no Maury for US! Yup!

But besides that sweet little tale of paternity the rest of our story is very rocky! I mean VERY rocky!! And no matter how much I hated him, I loved him. No matter how much my mother tried to convince me he wasn't shit, I knew he had to be something cuz I for one wasn't shit. And no matter where he was, whether I knew his address or not, I felt close to him. Yes, unconditional love for your parents can be a bitch, unless you just accept it! The day I laid down my pride, cried and said to myself "Fuck it! I'm not afraid to say I need him!" The load of life got a little lighter and the more I accept this it continues to be lighter. And now instead being the man of the house as I was in my childhood due to his absence; I am now living in his house where he is the man, allowing me to heal from my childhood.

Time has a way of healing you if you let it instead of letting the illusions of space take you. Plant seeds of green (green meaning peace, serenity, positivity, and yes MONEY!) instead of seeds of greed, jealousy, hate, etc. Those only make you ill. Not HIM.

Anyways... I'm getting kinda tired and loosing my train of thought (it was the run I took today =^D) I'll express this more maybe later on. Comment if you like or don't...

I love you,

Bajá Marie

Last Night I Cried:

I feel like I could cry tonight
Because I don't know who I am
And
Know not what I do or understand
And
I'll be damned, if I let another man rub my his hand
down there
And
I'll be damned, if I let someone mold me in order to keep hold of me again
And I can't stand the union of woman-man-woman-man-man-woman
But in my heart I seek unity?!?!?!
See what I'm saying yo
What the FUCK is wrong with me?!?!

They say I see therefore I am?
But I don't see me in the mirror I see them?
So how I do I live my life for me now when I miss living them.
Boy they did a number on me and I did nothing but love them.
But I don't point the finger to blame them
I blame me for my sins
I take responsibility in this life as I will again.
Cuz I can't stand to see the disunity of woman-man-woman-man-man-woman
Children and friends; husband and bands
So I must stand!

And,
take the stand
and
Testify
as I cry
replenish the soil and the soul (they are parallel)
By watering my dream seeds with fresh salt water tears
mixed with the life giving oil excreeting from my cheeks
while I sob releasing my deepest fears...
You love me?
You care?!
How dare YOU!!!
Care for!!!
me
I ain't nobody...
I'm just free flowing
raw unknowing
Energy.
And
if I die
no one would know
therre would be no soul to fold
Cuz she's already achieved the Olympian gold
she was predestined to fly
So I
testify
and I
test to fly
I fly high and stay fly
I fly for motherfucking free
And trust that I fly full
lifting my entire community
and I'm always on E.
And though I serve religiously
Nobody serves me but me
It's my motherfucking destiny
I'm free!

And
it don't matter what looney tunes
bloom in june
 and pull a boom boom
on me
Just to stab at my empty pockets
Violence can't stop this
I was mama's gun
and at 21, I upgraded to rockets
and torpedo blockage
Nothing can stop this
Not even me...

I'm protected
hasn't my life projected what is shown
came from the hood but I ain't blown
Imprisoned but never convicted
guilty waay before I even understood my innocence
Existed before I even pursued my own existence...

And
last night I cried
cried tears that absorbed the years
of my pain
and I wiped my eyes dry
and let the pain in them wipe away.
And today
I saw my eyes and I knew I was alive
I had survived
and now it was time to live
to live alive
so alive I live
Cuz I shine
inside and in between the lines
I shine
even in the shadows of time
I shine
Indefinetly
like the celibacy heat between my thighs
I shine
emitting rays (seen as race) of peace that erase the color lines
I shine
to bloom, fruit
and be ripe
and provide new-trition (pronounced nutrition)
that's my mission.
to be fly
fly high
unite so you and I and him and them and then
touch the sky
unite
with me
as we create a new repitition of history,
rather than this same old sob story.

By: Bajá Marie

What is Life Without Healing?

I have discovered today that Life without Healing is a Life without TRUTH so I composed a short poem to express this to you followed by a story of my life experience.

Poem First:

A time in life without healing
is a life in time without feeling
only forgetting
illusions
blinded by the sunlight instead of absorbing the Vitamin D 
your body needs 
in it's rays
I say all that to explain
the illusions line in this phrase
illusions which mask the true conclusion
the love
the truth
cuz hope is light
light is love 
love is truth 
and truth is love.

By: Bajá Marie

Now the story...

So I'm re-reading a book I read back in Chicago called "The Sunfood Diet Success System" by David Wolfe. I was a raw-food vegan for 3 consecutive months - from Dec. 2010 to March 2011. Once April hit birthday celebrations began and I fell OFF. But those 3 months were the best I felt in my whole life and that's because I was healing but I didn't know it then.

But now I'm reading this book again in hopes to find that feeling again. That healing. And the first line I read that sticks sooo far out to me is in the introduction where Wolfe quotes a wise adage stating:

 "All this struggling to learn, when all we have to do is remember." And Wolfe goes on to say "All the wisdom we require is already within us."

Since reading that line I've been contemplating and finding connections between it's meaning and my life. See I state I'm from Chicago in the premise of this blog because Chicago means so much to me, it shaped me and I despise it. Because it kept me "trapped in the closet" (yes I'm making reference to R. Kelly's song here, Chicago reps him sooo hard it iz real-diculous!!) I got my first job at age 12 and worked consistently every summer from that point to buy my own school supplies and back to school clothes because I felt like a burden growing up in a single parent home. And at age 17 I got a part-time job, to pay my own cell-phone bill, gas, car insurance and rent in my mother's one income home. Witnessing struggling I vowed never to become it but little did I know I was already it. Talk about making a dollar out of 15 cents, Niggah I live that shit. 

So as the story continues...there's is more in between these lines...but every story comes with its' own rhyme and in its' own time. At 18 I moved out with tubs of clothes and a car. Same job. I moved to live with a fellow Taurian in the homes from hell. The shit looked like Ida B. Wells, but I was free and we made it home. And I had felt there what I felt in my mother's single income home: Alone. Our friendship existed but it was never alive so I only existed and was never alive because I am the type that feeds off the energy my fellow mirrors provide and she provided me NO-thing so I didn't heal I just grew more ill. I ate only what I could afford and when I couldn't afford I didn't eat. Mostly that consisted of the high sodium and high in sugar sweets. Not to mention the endless supply of green to keep me from seeing what had become of me and when I wasn't numb on green I was numb on my feet: working. I tacked on 2 more jobs and 12 credit hours from a school where in any given bus ride it took me two hours to get there. I went to school in the mornings, worked in the afternoon, worked at night, worked all night - well more like 30 mins of the night (I had a boyfriend then, he wasn't shit then but I did't see it); and woke up early to do it all over again.

Take 3 of this story is my mother cut me off from the already lack thereof nourishment she supplied me and her minions followed unwillingly (I'm referring to her parents, my grandparents maternally). They would often sneak to give me rides and bring me fruit and always encouraged me (seen as IN-couraged) that chanting NAM-MYOHO-RENGE-KYO was the only thing I could do. So I did, I chanted walking down the streets in hopes the Latin Kings wouldn't see me. (sometimes they did but mostly I was indeed protected) Chanted in my room to keep the mice in the other room. (sometimes they still came but for the most part they stayed away I only found two in my room) Chanted in the living room, in the dark, in hopes light would soon find me and it did.

In 2008, I moved away from the kid and I got my own space. A studio apartment. More like a cell but I thought maybe now I could heal. And I started. Went down to working one job. Got my own gohonzon (the scroll we Nichiren Buddhists of the SGI Buddhist Organization pray to. It acts as our mirror). Went vegetarian and lost 20lbs. Bought a juicer, read books, watched movies, took walks while feeling safe and even had company that I didn't have to go and pick up they would just come to me, though the downfall was they always like to come in me. Shaking my head at myself then. They named the pill Plan B after me!! 

But anywayz that was just a phase that took place in the span of this time. I was healing but the pace was too slow and I didn't have much time. Feeling rushed was all I felt so I decided to give up. I went back to may ways which means I worked to much, stayed paying for other motherfuckers in order to stay paid. And I laid in bed never to rest, only to give head. Hey! Hey! Hey! Don't interpret this as me saying I was a prostitute, cuz I know that's what niggahs like to do, only taking things for literal, never digging deeper or questioning the obvious. And when I say niggahs I do mean all colors, shapes & figures, not just black folks. But NO! I worked a legit ass 9-5 that loved me and I loved them and I worked my ass off for them. But they never really gave me credit, and while working off my ass for them I was taking between 16 and 18 credits. Hours birthed hours and time blew by as I continued to dabble in purple haze and vegetable pot pies for all 4 years of college it was "mine". And I've always wanted to be a hoe but I decided I'd only be a hoe for my man so with that notion I stayed in relationships. And when I say "I always wanted to be a hoe", I mean a hoe in the way that we grow and plant things. Sharing love abundantly because love has always been abundantly within me. But I showed it the wrong way so I always received the wrong things.

I hope you are still following me...Fast forwarding during the time span of 2008-2010. I went back to all the things that prolounged my disease. I lent, I mean spent (lend is when it's given back, it wasn't. I walked down one-way streets going against traffic my whole life) money on Mommy, John (my lil bro/son), Moppie (maternal grandmother), friends and the men I thought were the one. And my bill (meaning me) was ill, blind, sick and pretending so good to be none of it. But I was thick. That was the only way you could tell. But big-business had blended thickness with attractiveness instead of sickness so I just blended in with it. 

Now here I am, officially a citizen of the Inglewood-Los Angeles area. Every morning, afternoon and evening I here planes fly by and I take lessons so that I too can soon fly by. I told my daddy this morning that I appreciate him letting me be a bum in his home. That I came here as I wounded being and this was my time to heal. He understood, long before I did, he understood. Because he was there through it all, but I didn't see, all I saw was his distance from me. I share this story with you to say that just because you have eyes doesn't mean you see things CLEARLY. That's why they having the saying "Even Stevie Wonder can see" Cuz that man can see!!! See things clearer than you and me. Because when he lost his sight he was healed.

Now now! don't go blowing your eyes out. You can heal without such drastic effort. But that doesn't mean drastic effort shouldn't be taken. Today in Inglewood-LA I am a 100% raw-food vegan, I live in a two-income household, I have no jobs, earned all my school credits, plenty of wealth but Im not paid, it's given. No love withheld so love I'm giving. And I started this blog in Inglewood-LA to be the hoe I've always wanted to be and be giving.

So I hope you can make parallels with my story and understand that our lives are not apart from one another only parallels. Mirrors to other dimensions of how our story can go if we take control. Also, I want you to know that at our core we are all raw energy but energy can only be used with the right facility (facility in this case being your human body). You have all the powers to heal inside of you as I do. And healing is not impossible cuz I'm doing it! Something I always hoped but never thought I'd get a chance to do and now I'm Feeling. And I gotta say if you're not feeling. You're not living. 

I was born April 21, 1989. I died at age 8 and came alive at age 22. If I can do it so can you!
(And if your wondering about the age 8 reference, I got a rhyme and story for that too but I'll save it for a later date)
I pray that you have happy times and love-full days.
In sunny days I pray.
I love you.

Fuck me! I am WE!: ONE

I don't live my life as I
I live my life as we
Cuz we creates community
And me just makes me
Who do you think I'd rather be?

When I push you up on my shoulders
your weight pushes me down into the earth
But I don't agree that I'm covered in dirt
Cuz I didn't say dirt, I said EARTH.
While I helped you succeed, you planted me as a seed.
And when I bloom, I know you'll pick me and together
we rose
as the story goes
The "Happily Ever After" isn't just a dose
of sweet prose
It is supposed!
to be
So again I ask thee
Who THE fuck do you think I'd rather be?
I or we?!

I think only of I as we
See the english language is the only one that deciphers
I from we
the rest
project
that in I there is only we
And when I see I rising high
I know it ain't cuz of the weed
but it is because of WE.

And what does we remind you of
Adam and Eve
Community
Celebrations, vibrations, libations and unity
Mmmmmm this is quite the feast
for the soul
Or would you rather have your soul sold
and be
a SELL-mate(pronouced cellmate) OR
a SELL-ibrity(pronouced celebrity)
fast-money, drug money, bet money, greed
Mmmmm so much green
I'd rather be high on the skyscrapers we build together
than the weed.
Cuz when I came out through the middle passage from my mother's womb
the doctor slapped my ass
and I screamed
FUCK ME!
I am WE!
Bajá Marie.

Who would you rather be?
Whole or sold
I gotta say being sold ain't getting old
but then again we ain't getting no youngah
I'm not tryin to change yah
I just want you to wondah
what life could be for everybody
if you weren't so consumed with you
and made you into two
or ten or a million, trillion, what then?!
Hmmm what then?!

By: Bajá Marie
There's more to come with this one. ;)

Just Want to Make Sure you Understand Me:

Let me take a minute to explain myself before I continue with the flood of poetry which will be presented in this place of inter-space that was given to me.
See...

I am Bajá Marie. I've always wanted to be a motivational speaker and I've spent all of my 22 years taking care and advising others in their daily affairs. One thing I learned from all of those years is that you can't change not a damn body but yo own body! OKAY! So for those of you who think you can change a fool, let me tell you as I'm sure others have, you can't change a fool. BUT! you can change you from attracting the fool with your gravitational pull!

I elaborate this way to say that I share myself with anyone who views because hopefully you can see me in your views and we can be not one lonely folks but two happy folks which can then multiply and add in many, many, many I mean like infinity more. Until we all soar and build each other more.
See...
 God Almighty, I call him the SUN, didn't give me authority to live your life for me. He only gave me my life for me. So by sharing the light and dark areas of my existence I hope it brings light, healing, or maybe you can just point your middle finger at me and say damn I'm glad I'm not like this lady, she crazy!!! Whatever makes you happy really. I gives No fuck, cuz I'm happy from sharing.
See...

I just want to make sure you understand me.
That is all, back to the poetry.
Bajá Marie

I Don't Have 20/20 but I see yo Weave:

My women
My women
Stop hiding your insecurities in synthetic ministries
of belief
See...

You don't need weave flowing down your back
just to comfort your knees?!?!
Just get off them PLEASE!!!
Wear your inner woman
See....

Don't put up a defense
while reading this
I'm not trying to be political
feminist-icle,
spiritual,
OR an individual
I'm an original
Mirroring your original
See...

I'm not saying we gotta go back to being primal
I AM saying we gotta go back to being natural
No don't look at my natural
look in the mirror,
dig your fingers in there
discover your natural.
See...

Allow me to check history
and I understand that time and time again
the inhabitants of MOTHER Earth
women have always outnumbered man
yet man is THE MAN
Because God is Man
So Man Can
But question:
Can God be a man when the womb is where life is created
and the womb lives in WO-man land
I can't stand
to see you abusing me
by pursuing this love for weave
instead a love for we
women are we-men
living to teach men
the reason
they are king
by living
as Queen
but you can't be queen without a crown
and where is it now
its drowned
DROWNED
by this noun: (weave)
See...

Weave please leave.
leave the premises
leave the scalps of my misses
Cuz I misses the way her ends curl
and her face twitches
when combing those nappy happy suns-of-bitches
But when tamed they are renamed
and flow
ever so beautifully
See...

So I come back to you
AND I'd like to ask you
What comes natural to you?
Do you even know?
Cuz God made you this Earth for you to show
To show you, you are Beautiful, powerful, mystical, and magical
everything IN nature mirrors
everything CONsumINg nature is against you.
See...

Don't get attached to these city streets
Don't embody the yellow and white lines in yo hair color high-lights
Don't let this concrete stick to your thick
like hair glue
Don't let these celebrities with their flamboyant weave and fake monies fool you
they aren't the true stars,
because they remain untrue to the stars....
See....

If it ain't natural
it aint YOU
So if you choke for cheese
to go broke on a new weave
every other month or maybe two weeks
I SCREAM: blasphemy QUEEN!!!
This ain't you before me
This ain't your true steez (steez meaning style)
Take off yo weave
Queen stay for a while
Walk on your wild side
Find the rainforest jungle inside
And REAL-ize
what God intended
when HE hoed and tended
his seed:
We-men (pronounced:women)

Take off your weave
Women

Take off your weave and SEE
see Your-self
Embrace Your flaws
And unlock Your-self
and release Your jaws
Your wealth?
Your wealth is in your head
Your wealth is your brain
Your wealth is not your Head-Game
that's insane!
See...

When I look in the mirror
I want to see me
instead of you seeing me
See natural beauties shouldn't be a rarity
So take the focus off your weave
and instead work on keeping your carpet clean
Cuz with a fro all you need is a pick and Afro Sheen
But for them pubics
See...
You need to listen carefully
Those require strict care you see
A combination of background checks,
tests, contracepts, and closed legs.

Your crowned jewel is not a net (a net being your vagina, see this metaphor I want you to get)
it is not your chest
Look up, chin up
Stop looking down
Take off the weave
and see the crown
See...

Your crowned jewel is right in front of you
it comes out of your mouth when you express your views and you smile
both emitting energy like sun rays
it shines from your eyes and the warmth of your embrace says everything is okay
it comes in when you listen with your heart
it comes out when he tastes you where your thighs part.
it blows the breeze in your sweet scent
because from the heavenly galaxy your seed was sent.
When you came, heaven wept
That's why it rains
You are more than what you know
More than what you show
but you'll never know
if you never know
So I write to provoke
Cuz while you sleep
I stay woke
While you weave your hair 
mine I stroke
yet we are reflections
and while you remain in distractions
I live in depression
cuz your reflection
is NOT my reflection
See I wept when
you came
cuz with these weaves you are not the same.

I write, I wept, I wait
For you to come back
and mirror me.
Come back and mirror me.
Be queen again
so the Earth can relive in balance.
I am not against you
doin you
that's why I'm doing you
cuz what what you do right now ain't true
and I am TRUTH
so I know you.
I don't have 20/20 but I do see you
And yo ass cracks, black knees, cleavage and weaves
Show me something more won't you please
Show YOU you are more won't please?!?!?
Please!
PLEASE!!!

By: Bajá Marie

What is Truth?

Truth is love
Love is healing
I believe in love without feeling
Just being love
and living truth.
Wearing your heart on your sleeve
and your truth as your steez (steez meaning style)

Along with expressing truth through words, thoughts, ideas, melodies and movement.
I've decided to make TRUTH with my art of craft making. Here are a few things I've done thus far.

These are Nike's turned Truthies that I did for me. But anything I do for me I would gladly do for my fellow man, woman and tran...Yes I understand.

This is a snapback I created...It spells out TRUTH in its' original intent. I haven't worn it. But boy do I like it.

And lastly these are some TRUTH earrings. These are the prototypes though. I will soon get much better at this flow. But for those who didn't know I make stuff now you know!

The purpose of this line is not to line my pockets with dime bags or dimes. It actually quite the opposite see. I wish to make profits from these physical manifestation of my love i.e. trinkets too have unlimited funds for my non-profit organization. In which I plan to rebuild community by training our future generations with art discipline, technique, freedom and creativity. I am not greedy, because I love thee. All of humanity. So I hope that you will love me, support me and give me your money =^D.

That's all for now folks. Til Tomorrow Celebrate yo LIFE!
Cuz I'm the truth and I said "It's alright".
Good day to you.
And Good night.

Allow Myself to Introduce Myself:

My name is Bajá Marie Poindexter.

Bajá derives from the Arabic word Bahja meaning splendor and joy.
Marie is the first name of my favorite auntie and the middle of many queens and beauties.
Poindexter is the name of my ancestors given to them the from their slave master. The Poindexter's were from Norwegia and had a nice home and small plantation in the South. I'm not entirely sure where. My research of them ended as a cold case. But anyways, it's my name now. Given to me by my father because he wanted a sun (pronounced son). But he got me. And stamped me with Poindexter and hand-made Bajá Marie (basically my daddy named me).

My birthday is obselete. Every day I celebrate the life that was given to me.
It says I'm a bull though. I think it's because I hate BULL-shit.

This blog is called B. Truth because my first Initial is B and I only associate with the truth.
My motto since this year began is "I only associate with the truth and if you ain't the truth I can't fuck with you!" Yeah that's the Bull in me I guess.

I'm from the Southside of Chicago and have experienced more than my mother will acknowledge and my father even knew. But I'm here now, I made it through and I present myself mind, body and soul in this blog to share myself with you. Because I grew up on Barney and I believe that sharing is caring. And since birth I was born with the defect to LOVE all living beings unconditionally for no good reasoning, other than that LOVE always seemed right to me. It was my inner healing.

So I'm not afraid to be open. I'm not afraid to share. Because my care outweighs my fear.

I believe I'm art personified:
I sing
I dance
I choreograph
I write
I speak
I color abtract art with crayola crayons
I read THEN rebel (in-sight-full knowledge is more powerful than blind violence)
I'm always learning, always curious
creatively thinking
I don't dream dreams
I plant seeds
I'm growing just as my seeds

Also I'm a hand maker since my name was hand-made. I love making things for people instead of buying them. I hate money and love bartering.

Don't get me wrong I do wish to be wealthy but only to build community! Just give me a garden, fabric, shea butter and water and I'm happy living me. But I can't be happy living in this world til we rebuild community. Yes I did say WE. So astrology said as a BULL I'll have money and I have already planted that seed.

So that's me for now. I am more. So there's more to come.

PS: I love kisses! Kisses making EVERYTHING better.

History repeats within and without me: I am the key: Divinity

Break down all the walls surrounding me
Break down me human being
to transient being.

Rip off the chains
Embrace change
and free me

I am your inner light energy
Your lifeforce source
Your king
Your queen
yes you are royalty because of me

I am the inner-G (G meaning Gangstar)
in-your-G
ENERGY
believe in me
as I live in you
A slave to you when I could be so free

Release me:
purity
Increase me:
eternity
See me:
happy
Be me:
true-self/Divinity

By: Bajá Marie